I was feeling bad about a difficult family situation as I was driving home and then it just struck me. The problem wasn’t evil people, although they certainly are a problem. It was me. I was the one who chose to allow my body to curl up into a tense little stress ball. I was the one who was feeling dark and crafting scenarios in my head where the perpetrators would be in peril. Isn’t that one of the great things about being a writer? You can enact whole revenge sequences in your head that never make it to the real world. The pen is mightier than the sword which also reminds me that intention and imagination still carry power in my soul. This too, is mine to protect.
There’s a verse that people like to throw around when these feelings come that reminds us that vengeance belongs to God. He will take care of it. Again, those creeping thoughts come up imagining just what God might do. Isn’t there a heavenly suggestion box? Man, would I pack that sucker full of ideas. Let me tell you what I’d like to see.
That, too, comes with consequence… for me. It’s like when I was on that turbulent flight to Mexico and had made good use of the barf bag. When deplaning, the others in my group asked me why I was carrying the barf bag with me. Didn’t I know I could leave it behind? Even the stewardesses gave me a questionable glance. You don’t want to take care of this. I can clean up after myself is what I thought.
He will make the crooked paths straight (and deal with the crooked people, too). I must remember that God is a Creator, a Restorer, and a Deliverer. The broken things will be healed, the barren lands will grow fruit, and all will be made stronger because of these current trials.
If God isn’t your flavor, think of it this way. Would you rather get all funky playing in the shit pile that seems to be covering your every waking place or instead dream of a nice bubble bath that awaits at the end of the day? It’s all a matter of perspective. Do you get caught up in the disappointment of today or can you hope for something better?
Garbage in, garbage out is a programming concept that applies to the rest of life. If you waste your time thinking about bad things, eventually you, too, will become bad and start acting on that. Why bother? Then the bad ones you were trying to avoid rejoice because now you resemble them when you look in the mirror.
The day to day may not change — at least not as quickly as you would hope. Leave the barf bag behind. Relax those fists and jaws and put your mind on better things. Focus on becoming a creator of better things rather than trying to destroy those things that are unproductive and harmful.